It's been awhile

I have been a huge blogger slacker lately, I'm not really sure why, I guess sometimes I feel like I don't have much to blog about. A lot of things are going on right now, though, some changes that we are going to be putting into place soon. I'm excited but also a bit nervous. We have been talking a lot lately about what Randy would like to do as a career. He used to be so against going to school because he didn't really feel like it did any good. On Sunday however, he mentioned that he wasn't as against school anymore, and he's been thinking about possibly becoming an RN. While this is exciting to me, it also scares me a lot and makes me a little depressed because I look at how much LeeAnn does homework and I realize that not only would Randy be gone at school but he would also be very busy studying and doing homework. I just don't know if I'm ready to have him for such a limited time. I know if he decided to go though we would work it out. The other big change is that we're going to try to sell our car, so that we could put that money toward our credit card debt and pay off all of it by next February or March. I always used to say that we would never do it with one vehicle, but lately I just can't justify having two vehicles. For the most part I don't go anywhere, the only places I go is to take Hailey to school and to go to choir on Wednesday nights. Hailey will be done with school at the end of May and my choir won't go much beyond that so honestly I know I won't really go anywhere. I am also ready to make this sacrifice to get out of our credit card debt, I am so sick of it! Then I think I'm going to rip up our credit cards!! The next big change is that I am dieting and excercising and I am going to lose weight and get in shape. I am so tired of not being comfortable with my clothes and having nothing to wear and I don't like the way it makes me feel. So... I am really doing it! I know I've said that a couple of times before, but this time is for real and it feels good. Dieting is so hard, I do really well until I see something that I REALLY want and then it just doesn't seem worth it. I know it is though, and I really need to do this for me. So, here I go. There's also other changes that we're going to put in to place that I'm really excited for. I fall short in the mother department. I know I'm not a terrible mom but I know I could be doing better! I watched a little bit on Super Nanny the other night and she was talking to this mom saying "where was your enthusiasm? It was like you were just doing another chore, just something you had to do" I'm sure that wasn't the exact way she said it, but that's the jist. Anyway, I realized (which I've done before) that a lot of the time I look at my kids as another chore, another something I have to do. Someone else I have to take care of. And that's a really sad way to look at your kids, I want to be remembered as the mom who took time to play with my kids. I don't want it to be just another thing I have to take care of. I love my kids so much and they deserve better!! So there are some things we're going to change that will help take care of that!! I am very excited for this summer, I feel like it is going to be a summer of change! I love life right now, it just seems like we're at the brink of something wonderful! I can't wait to see what will happen this summer, I have a feeling it will be great.